Focus On What?

I have spent most of my life in self reflection. You can be reflecting on your part so much you give the wrong people access making excuses for their behavior instead of shutting them off. I have went through allot of therapy, book reading, watching speakers asking myself what is wrong with me. What I found is why am I not investing more in me and less in them? Many people who choose to not invest in their own life have a habit of taking from others because it is easier. When I started investing in my own life I found I had less time for others and that bothered some people. They no longer could create dramas in my life or abuse me because I was busy. They couldn’t understand my unavailability and for some reason had nothing to do with their behavior. For some reason they felt access to me was my duty to give them. I now ask myself with everything and most everyone, what would I prefer to do? For example, garden or interact with this person. What values do they hold so deeply would be a stumbling block towards an unequal weight of time full of expectations and questionable fruits from it? Would it be the best use of time? Time is expensive and not everyone values expensive and are quicker to steal. My part in the equation was my time would have been better given to good vibes. I am not a rude type… I am not ignorant and don’t have much in common with many. That is why I deal with social anxiety and am socially awkward. Not everyone I relate to.